I'm not dead

Hi.
What an incredible week it's been. I'm probably one of the most blessed people in the universe. Really.

Here are a couple reasons why...
1. I have the best family in the world. You've probably heard this before, by every other person you know. They're probably right. But I'm right too. Let me explain. I have the best family for me, in my world. We have the perfect balance of personalities. We teach each other. We lift each other. We cry with each other. But I know that I have my mother for a reason. That my dad is the way he is for a purpose. That my siblings are who they are, and going through the things in their lives at this time, in order that our lives, which are intertwined perfectly, can be the way they were designed to be.

2. God is real. He has a plan for us. There is a reason obedience is the first law in heaven. Once we realize this, and that God loves us, everything falls into place. It may not be the place we were expecting, or want but it is the place they are supposed to fall to.

3. Time is such a human thing.

and, timing is everything.

4. I am passionate about education. I am passionate about learning and teaching. I want nothing more than to be a teacher. A teacher of foods (that's my major fyi) and a teacher for my children. But before I can teach I must first learn. I love learning about and from people. My mother taught me that being humble means being teachable. I'm not a perfect learner yet, but I hope that I will always be a good listener and that I will continue to learn from the most perfect teacher.

5. "As a sister in the gospel, you render compassionate service to others for reasons that supersede desires for personal benefits. In this you emulate the Savior, who, though a King, did not seek position, nor was He concerned about whether others noticed Him. he did not bother to compete with others. His thoughts were always tuned to help others. He taught, healed, conversed, and listening to others. He knew that greatness had little to do with outward signs of prosperity or position. He taught and lived by this doctrine: 'He that is greatest among you shall be your servant'. In the end, the number of prayers we say may contribute to our happiness, but the number of prayers we answer may be of even greater importance. Let us open our eyes and see the heavy hearts, notice the loneliness and despair; let us feel the silent prayers of others around us; and let us be an instrument in the hands of the Lord to answer those prayers."
I just found this quote by President Uchtdorf. I love it, now I'm going to try to live it.

Combo

So there's no such thing as a perfect man...but I can dream right?

Bachelor #1-I would take your good looks, sense of humor, and laid back personality.
Bachelor #2-Please contribute the love of your family, work ethic, friendship, awkwardness, and your ridiculous smile.
Bachelor #3-I love your caring nature, quiet concern, your laugh and silly quirks.
Bachelor #4-Your strength of character, love for others, deep conversion and compassion attract me to you.

Okay, so now I must become this person. Wish me luck.

Single-ness

1. I don't like being single
b. Family is the best
3. Actions speak louder than words
d. Games are for insecure people
5. I may or may not be insecure sometimes.
f. Making yourself vulnerable again is hard. I do not like it.
7. I love trusting trustworthy people. Here's the catch: not everyone is trustworthy
h. Timing is everything
9. We were not made to be single.
j. Dating=School for the soul
11. People are really awesome. I love people
l. Free dinners are GOOOOD
13. Feeling inferior is a form of pride.
m. I am prideful
15. In order for a muscle to grow, it must break. Yes, the heart is a muscle. I learned that from the best man I know.

Hello, I'm 14 again

And...the most awkward person award goes to...
Yours Truly.

Really though, I am sometimes an awkward person. When I don't know what to say to people I just either act super silly or I get really quiet and forget how to activate my vocal chords. This doesn't happen very often, but when it does it's bad. Like really bad.

I had an awkward night tonight. My stomach was like butterfly central. They were chaotic. It made me want to throw up and laugh all at the same time. Weird. So naturally, I was quiet. And then beat myself up about it. WHAT IN THE WORLD?

I need to snap out of it. I think as human beings we think too much. We are critical...remember how I was going to try and not be critical of myself. Oops.
We over-analyze. Calm down. Relax. Deep breaths. Life is good. Just because you were weird for one night doesn't mean the world is ending. Being silly is good right?

Oh. I just got this bike :)


What do you do when you have awkward, freezing moments...I'm needing some help.

It started at 6 am

Oh today was a great day.

I was babysitting my sister and I went outside to find her facing the street singing the National Anthem at the top of her lungs. I watched her for a while and couldn't help but giggle uncontrollably to myself. I wanted to cry at the same time. It was such an incredible moment and I wish I could relive it again and again.

I really love looking at stars too. And throwing fun parties. I have some pretty incredible friends.

Kind-of nervous for tonight. First PAC rehearsal.
One of my best friends is getting married tomorrow. I can't wait. La la la
I have a really great life. You do too, don't you?

Critically Thinking...

Whyy are we trained as human beings to be so critical?

I took a class while I was a dance major that taught us how to analyze dances. Great skill. Fast forward to me sitting in a concert, trying to enjoy a dance piece. Impossible.

We're taught to be critical of movies. Be honest, you always read rotten tomatoes before you go see a movie. Unless it's Eclipse. You go hoping your $8.50 will be worth it and even if it isn't, you go again the next week. But the minute you get out of a movie you're dissecting each element of the film in your head, and then in the car ride home with your friends.

And you write critical papers. Your TA's want you to "think deeper". To look at things from another perspective. Good for your education. Not good with human beings.

So then you go on a date. Tricky huh? Cuz you can't be picky. But you're watching the way he eats, if he opens the door and everything he's saying. You're also observing his body language. Does he like you? Will you get to go out again (calm down, you just got your menu)? Post date, how are his texts? His response time? Wow we just can't enjoy an evening can we? We're being those critical thinker's we've been trained to be.

Oh and now you're looking in the mirror. Guess what happens? I don't need to tell you what happens. You're squishing and touching your face, looking at it from different angles, making faces and you're not happy. You're being critical.

I'm going to try this week to not be so critical. I'm not going to critical of my friends, of movies, of boys and especially myself.

Let things be the way they are. Enjoy them.

Summer is the best

Driving is one of the most relaxing things.
Especially when you're driving in an open jeep, on a cool summer night.



Pure Bliss.